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If you miss the person you were before you started apologizing and explaining yourself for existing.
If you’ve started rehearsing your feelings before you share them, like you’re preparing testimony.
If the tone is always wrong, the timing is always wrong, the phrasing is always wrong and somehow the point is never the point.
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If you can’t tell which is more exhausting: keeping the peace, or keeping your own reality intact.
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If you keep replaying conversations like they're crime scenes, trying to find the moment you set them off.
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This May Feel Familiar
The stories kept changing.
DOCUMENTATION
One day you’re reacting to something that clearly happened. The next day you’re defending the fact that it happened at all.
So I kept the receipts.
Texts. Emails. Timelines. Sworn statements and legal filings that don’t care what the most repeated version is. Only what the receipts say.
Because when someone is committed to rewriting your life in real time, you need more than facts.
You need facts they can't bully away.
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The next section offers a brief glimpse of how being the keeper of those facts helped make the aftermath survivable.
The Stories Kept Changing
Documentation
The stories kept changing.
One day you’re reacting to something that clearly happened. The next day you’re defending the fact that it happened at all.
So I kept the receipts.
Texts. Emails. Timelines. Sworn statements and legal filings that don’t care how my ex has always told it. Only what the receipts say.
Because when someone is committed to rewriting your life in real time, you need more than facts.
You need facts they can't bully away.
+++
The next section offers a brief glimpse of how being the keeper of those facts helped make the aftermath survivable.
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Documentation
The stories kept changing.
One day you’re reacting to something that clearly happened. The next day you’re defending the fact that it happened at all.
So I kept the receipts.
Texts. Emails. Timelines. Sworn statements and legal filings that don’t care how my ex has always told it. Only what the receipts say.
Because when someone is committed to rewriting your life in real time, you need more than facts.
You need facts they can't bully away.
+++
The next section offers a brief glimpse of how being the keeper of those facts helped make the aftermath survivable.
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Preserved Texts & Emails
Actual texts and emails, preserved in real time. Rage spirals, apologies, reversals and quiet control tactics unfold exactly as they happened - no hindsight, no cleanup. This isn’t interpretation. It’s the raw record of how abuse actually sounds while you’re still inside it.
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Work, Personal & Legal Records
Work documents, personal records and legal materials show how the harm moved off the page and into real life. Agreements, filings and financial records track the escalation from emotional control to material damage. What was lost, what was salvaged and what couldn’t be explained away.
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Timelines that Show the Pattern
Detailed timelines reconstruct the relationship in sequence, aligning messages, actions and the fallout. When events are placed side by side, patterns become undeniable - escalation, retaliation, collapse. What felt confusing in real time becomes unmistakable when the full arc is finally visible.
Why This Exists
Abuse that doesn’t leave bruises is easy to rewrite. Easy to minimize. Easy to deny. And inside queer and neurodivergent relationships, it gets extra cover. Because people expect harm to look a certain way. And this doesn’t.
Keeping a record wasn’t revenge. It was orientation. A way to stay anchored when reality kept getting questioned, redirected and erased in plain sight.
STAY CONNECTED
The release date for
The Narcissism Files
will be announced soon.
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If this connects to your life, there’s more here when you’re ready.
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© 2025 by Elle Dee Asche. Made by The Monkey Barrel